Who’s your buddy?

Who’s your buddy?

That was a question I use to ask the twins a lot when they were just learning to talk. Of course, the answer was always Daddy.

As they get older, I know that’s not always going to be the answer. I’m OK with that. Fact is, they turn seven in a month and have already been pushing the envelop and away from being Daddy’s little girls. They’re getting bigger, and developing there own wants, likes and opinions. With which some of, I won’t agree. And now that they are in First grade, there are so many more influence pulling them this way and that way. Some days it seems their entire energy is focused on pushing their limits with their mom and I.

Now don’t get me wrong, they are great kids. Several times in the just the past few months, when the family has gone out to eat, total strangers have come up to compliment how well our children were behaving in the restaurant. I believe that this is because; we have been truly blessed with wonderful children, and secondly, we have made it plain how we expect them to act in public. And how they should respect others and themselves. This doesn’t work 100% of the time (big surprise, huh?). But K and I try to be consistent in the expectations we have for our children.

Now, being consistent doesn’t always mean I’m their "buddy", but like I said, I’m OK with that. My job is to love them as a father, and that can get in the way of being a "best friend". I have to help them become the best person they can be, and to keep them from appearing on any Jerry Springer shows in the years to come.

I don’t think I really understood what it meant to be a father until my own Dad passed away seven months after the twins were born. I was at his side, holding his hand when he took his final breath. Whether we agreed or argued, he was always my dad. He was an unyielding, ever present force of nature for me. Even when his health was failing, his presence was so strong that my mind couldn’t process the concept of his potential absence.
Hours later, after he had passed away, I was sitting, holding one of my infant daughters. I finally understood that in her life, for better or worse, I would be that force of nature. I wouldn’t be the same kind of father I had known. But still, God willing, ever present watching over her and her sister in the fragility of life.

I will, and have been a lot of things to them; buddy, disciplinarian, teacher, protector, nurse, idiot, Santa Clause, Easter Bunny, and yes, I’ll admit it, I’m the Tooth Fairy as well. All of these smaller roles make up one of the most important characters I will ever be.

Being a Dad.